International Women's Day Poem

I started enforcing my boundaries and expressing my frustration at being wronged and they said I shouldn’t complain,

I was sad or down and they said I should be happy, 

I made jokes and I laughed and they said it’s fake or for attention,

I expressed my personality and they said I’m not funny,

I shared myself and my interests and they didn’t care,

And then they said, why are you not interesting enough, you never share anything,

I wanted what I gave out in return and that made me delusional,

I said what bothers me and that made me an annoying c*nt,

They told me to stay quiet, so I became even louder,

They told me to quit being unfunny, so I laughed even harder,

They told me I’m too gentle so I started making love to myself,

They told me I’m too emotional, too sensitive, too dramatic,

So I stopped believing in their words and discovered an amazing life filled with passion, feelings and sensations,

They told me I shouldn’t let them treat me this way,
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So I thanked them for the obvious and walked away,

I laughed and it was too loud,

I cried and it made me weak,

I loved and it made me weak,

I was a woman in love,

I am a woman in love,

In love with everything,

And I’m not afraid to shout it from the rooftops,

I am also an angry woman, frustrated with the way we treat each other,

Frustrated with the gender norms, stereotypes, pressures of masculinity,

The fear of being vulnerable, the fear of our emotions, feelings and passions,

Frustrated with rape, with abuse, with assault, with domestic violence, with gaslighting and manipulation,

So yes, I complain when something doesn’t feel right,

Yes I react negatively to an unfair situation,

Yes, I don’t just stand there, quietly, taking it all in,

I fight, and I complain, and I love

- Jaanika Malla